I just got a NILMDTS, Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep, call this evening.  Those calls always make my heart sink.  This evening I have a struggling Mommy and her family in my prayers.  It’s moments like these that really make you think about what is important in this life.  There are so many challenges and trials that batter us about.  It seems cruel that losing a child is one of them.

If you know a mother who is going through the grief and pain of such a loss, reach out.  Don’t stay silent!

I remember being newly married and a friend of mine losing a baby.  She has Lupus and she lost several babies before she carried one to term.  I am ashamed that I was silent.  It was awkward.  There is always the question of what to say.  I didn’t want to add to the grief.  But instead, by standing aside, I let her suffer alone.  I hope others were not so intimidated and afraid.  I wish I could go back.  With maturity and motherhood in my belt I would be a better friend.

If you don’t know what to say give a hug, send flowers, write a letter….SERVE.

It is always hard when I step into those hospital rooms and feel the weight of the moment.  I feel like a 19 year old all over again.  I don’t know what to say.  And then I pray for the strength to do my job, to be strong and compassionate and to say what that Mother needs to hear.  And I fell better knowing that maybe I gave her a moment of peace, that my shoulder to cry on lifted her burdens and that Heavenly Father will surely look after her and comfort and heal.

NILMDTS is a wonderful non-profit organization that sole purpose is to help families heal.  I am proud to be one of their volunteers.  If you are looking for a charity that really makes a difference this year to contribute to please consider them.  You can learn more at their website :

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Afsi - January 4, 2013 - 7:34 am

Oh Jennifer! I just happened to be going back in time because you re-formatted your web page…and then happened to stumble upon this post and now I am fully in lump in my throat, tear mode. THANK YOU for doing this. I promise you, those are the most important photos you ever take!
I have a treasure of photos from you from my earth baby and I love them so very much. But I know in my heart, what those NILMDTS photos mean to each and every one of us, who have lost a baby. I commend you for being able to go to task to such a difficult situation. I had so much respect for our photographer, despite the gravity of the situation. You guys make it possible for us to hold on to our angel babies. I am sure you realize how heavenly this is! And I love you for it.

Ashley Tracy - January 2, 2011 - 6:38 pm

Best of luck as you take those pictures that will capture that baby’s legacy for his/her family forever. My pictures of baby Ryan taken by his angel nurse I will cherish the rest of my life! You are a special woman to do this service, to enter their lives in that moment is so hard, but you will be remembered for it and appreciated so much!

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